"Daniel?"

Jack pushed open the front door and stepped into the dark house. He knew his way around well enough, even though Daniel hadn't lived there long.

Walking silently up the hallway, he strained to hear any sound. Jack hadn't bothered phoning Daniel to let him know he had finally been released from the infirmary. He had wanted it to be a surprise.

At the living room door, he hesitated. Through a tiny crack, he saw flashes of blue in the darkness, dancing on the walls, casting weird shadows and highlights in the gloom. Daniel's television was switched on, but the volume had to be turned way down, since Jack couldn't hear it.

He reached for the door handle, turning it silently, and then he pushed open the door.

At first he didn't see Daniel. His eyes went automatically to the flickering television set, and then scanned the two couches thinking that maybe his lover had fallen asleep while watching... what *had* he been watching anyway? The History Channel?

Jack's eyes widened in shock when the images on the screen began to make sense to him.

He hadn't yet seen the footage Daniel had shot on the planet. There was a copy of this sitting on Jack's desk back at the mountain, and as the 2IC of the project, he was required to review the tape. So far, he hadn't been able to bring himself to look at it.

It had been hard enough to attend the memorial for Janet, what with the pain from his own injuries threatening to bring him to his knees at any moment, but no force on Earth could have kept him away from the ceremony.

As soon as the service was over, he had been hustled back to the infirmary, where he had spent the next few days resting and healing. The rest of the team had been in to visit, but no one had said much. Sam's eyes were haunted, Teal'c withdrew even farther into himself, and Daniel...

Jack had been worried about Daniel.

He'd looked like he hadn't slept in weeks, unshaven, heavy lidded and wild eyed. He was deeply troubled, trying to struggle through the loss all by himself.

Jack took another step into the dark room and watched in silence, as the tape showed how a blast from a staff weapon had robbed them of another good person. Another life lost to the snakes. Another friend... gone.

A small sound drew Jack's attention to the window.

Daniel stood, both hands braced against the glass, his head bowed, his body trembling uncontrollably.

Jack was across the room in an instant. He wrapped both arms around Daniel's waist and buried his face in the soft brown hair. Daniel straightened and twisted around to face him, his hands flying up to caress Jack's face.

"I couldn't save her," he said miserably. Jack searched his lover's eyes, noting the bright sheen of unshed tears.

Daniel almost never cried. His life was a litany of death and loss, a catalog of bitter grief, yet he always valiantly fought against the need to weep. Jack's heart contracted in sympathy.

There was nothing he could do to help. He knew Daniel would shoulder the guilt for Janet's death. Daniel had been there when she died; he hadn't been able to prevent it. He would always believe it was his fault, as surely as if he had been the one firing the staff weapon that had killed her.

Jack felt sure that nothing he could say would make a difference.

He pulled Daniel close, offering his own strength, using his body like a shield, keeping him warm, keeping him safe, surrounding Daniel with his love.

"I know," Jack whispered softly. And he did know. How many times had he felt like this himself? Every time a man or woman under his command had died, Jack had taken on the guilt and a little part of him had died too. Every time.

He didn't want this for Daniel. He didn't want to watch the erosion of his lover's soul, but how could he prevent it? This is who Daniel was. He cared. He cared too damned much, but Jack wouldn't have it any other way.

Daniel let his fingers slip into Jack's silver hair. He leaned his forehead on Jack's and a shudder passed though his body.

Jack held him closer, whispering words of love and understanding in his lover's ear, until he felt the moment the tide broke.

Daniel didn't sob, or wail, or even gasp. Many moments went by while the tears he had held back so stoically merely fell from his eyes, tracking down his face and soaking the front of Jack's shirt.

Finally he tilted his head back to look into Jack's face. "I wanted to save her. I couldn't do a god damned thing, Jack." Shimmering blue met glittering brown.

Jack nodded. "I know, babe. I know." Daniel laid his head down on Jack's shoulder with a sigh, his forehead turned into Jack's warm neck. Jack tightened his hold on Daniel and lowered his lips into the soft hair nestled just below his chin.

He knew.

They stood like that for a long time, together by the window in the darkened room, with only the eerie flickering light from the silent TV illuminating their faces.

Outside, snow was falling, covering everything in white, hiding the grime and dirt and ugliness of the world in a thin veneer of innocence and purity.

The two men rocked in each other's arms, taking what comfort they could from each other. Both of them knew that sometimes there was nothing else you could do, except love each other.

And in the depths of the night, their love would be enough to see them through.